A new heart…

I sat in the cardiovascular intensive care unit, not for the first time, not for the last.broken-heart_RegimensWithGrace.jpg

I watched the monitor above my husband’s head – blood pressure, oxygen saturation, pulse and most importantly, that strip of squiggles that showed every beat of his failing heart. Those beats had dominated our life for months. I knew more about what caused it to beat fast, what slowed it down, what caused it to skip a beat than any romance writer in history.

And that night we were trying it all. The picture above my head was ugly and growing worse. The two IVs that had been continually pumping anti-arrhythmia drugs into his system for the last couple of months were not enough. The lines grew more and more erratic as the night wore on toward morning, sporadic peaks turned into a roller coaster and I gripped his hand, knowing his defibrillator was about to painfully fire again, shocking his heart back into a stable rhythm.vfib_RegimensWithGrace.jpg “Please God, no.”

It hurt, worse than any horse kick, he said. The knowing dread of that kick was horrible for him. The nurse brought boluses, or large IV doses, of magnesium, potassium and needed medication. Eventually his heart was soothed. He slept.

Fotor071000113This was not a cure. This was a wait for a cure. The only thing that was going to keep this from happening again was a heart transplant. Without a new heart, one day medication and defibrillator shocks would not be enough.

This weekend, millions of dollars are being spent on the movie “Fifty Shades of Grey”. “Erotic romance.”

Without going into it too much (other writers have done so beautifully), the most damning thing I read came from readers who really liked the books.

“I found potential in their relationship and the idea that Grey was a haunted soul. What woman can resist the subliminal need to nurture a tortured soul?”

I probably lost you there. Needed heart transplant. Fifty Shades.

Here’s the thing.

Nothing would help my husband but a new physical heart. There is an unknown family out there who decided that their 20-year-old son would not die in vain. His death brought my husband new life.

There are millions, even billions, of tortured souls out there. A woman or man is not the answer to the salvation of that soul. A person giving up their life in a twisted relationship does not bring salvation to either soul. It brings death to both.

There is only one answer.

“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.” Ezekiel 36:26

A heart transplant.

Broken people need a healer. Jesus came to heal.

People are in bondage. Jesus came to bring freedom.

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;”
Luke 4:18

I feel very privileged to have been a part of my husband’s road to transplant. But it was not, and is not, my job to heal his tortured soul.

Thank God that was accomplished by Jesus.


If you are interested in the organ transplant process, please follow this link for more information and to register for organ donation: Donate Life America. Please consider giving the gift of life.

If you have not yet received the gift of eternal life, it is waiting for you. Please contact me. I would love to share the news of Christ’s work on the cross with you.


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A recovered prodigal and expert breeder of dustbunnies, I'm a wife and a mother who just wants to live all-out, whole-heartedly, full-tilt boogie for Jesus. Living life with abandon combined with the daily regimens of life can be hard - that's where grace comes in. Oh, I love the balance of grace.
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A recovered prodigal and expert breeder of dustbunnies, I’m a wife and a mother who just wants to live all-out, whole-heartedly, full-tilt boogie for Jesus. Living life with abandon combined with the daily regimens of life can be hard – that’s where grace comes in. Oh, I love the balance of grace.

14 thoughts on “A new heart…”

  1. What a powerful message! The beauty of the gift by the sacrifice of Jesus came through His Blood and we are to call upon Him for this soul-healing. I am grateful that God blessed your husband with a new physical heart that he can live longer and with you.
    I am grateful that you are my neighbor at Suzanne’s.
    Caring through Christ, ~ linda

      1. Beautifully done, Angela, missed you last night, I hope you feel better. It was a powerful class.

        This page is gorgeous, well written… Did you do this all by yourself, the design and everything? Wow… I love “One Shade of Red” is that your original work. Beautiful.

        1. Thanks so much Tunya. I missed being there.

          I have a theme of course but this one makes me do everything on my own. I utilized a photo I found for One Shade of Red but all graphics, cropping, font, etc. are mine. I’m glad you like the site and the content!

          I miss teaching but am glad Tony is back. God gave the desire. He will provide a place. I appreciate your encouragement.

  2. One shade of Red… I pray this grips hearts reading this for the first time. A very powerful truth you’ve been so privileged to experience, watching your husband’s story unfold. So grateful you shared it today!

    1. Thank you very much. God’s redeeming love that changes hearts and makes us new – an amazing story to tell. I love that He makes it beautiful and personal for each of us.

    1. Thank you! Helping people to live free is my heart so I was thrilled to find the linkup and appreciate the opportunity to be a part of such a group.

  3. One shade of Red is exactly all that this tortured world needs to heal the brokenness that steals the beating hearts that cry out for recognition, but so few really see it because our eyes are fixed on the quick fixes and the screens above our focus that lose us in the make believe stories.
    A powerful post that addresses this topic so well, thank you. I am grateful for the gift of a new heart for your dear one and will be praying for this precious family who made the choice to give life in their loss.
    Bless you!

    1. Thank you Dawn, for your beautifully written words. “Our eyes are fixed on the quick fixes and the screens above our focus…” How often we settle for the “bolus” when God offers the cure.

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